Today, my parents came to visit me. My dad wasn't feeling well, but we managed to be together for a total of 3 hours without fighting, which was awesome. We went to Friendly's for a meal and then we walked around Madison and went into stores. We found a really cool vintage clothes store and my mother helped me pay for an awesome reversible vest. It was really nice seeing them again, even though I haven't felt homesick. It was just a good feeling being with them for a short amount of time without it being a forced thing.
I feel as though I have a newly found appreciation for them. It's refreshing.
I don't have much else to say, this week has just been filled with class and work, like most other weeks. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened.
p.s. One of my friend's older brother came to visit. We started talking and realized we have a lot in common. I just left his room after a 3 hour long intellectually stimulating and profound conversation about human nature, the human condition, suffering, the arts, music, etc. Times like these are what I long for in college and I hope to have more of these experiences along the way. i wish to find my true self through being able to express what I know and expand on that knowledge.
9/26/09
9/21/09
Freshman Seminar Post #2
This place is not a house, but it feels so much like home now. I find beauty in almost every one I meet and it makes me question why I have hated humanity for so long. Perhaps, until now, I have not met the right people to share this world with. I've written something, finally, and it feels like a piece of my soul has been lifted and placed onto a dry sheet of paper for the world to wash clean.
I do not dream at night, but this afternoon while taking a nap I dreamed that my friends and I were vacationing in a strange place, a circus beach town. We were all holding hands, or linking arms, I can't remember quite well. The day turned to night and the beach was purely green. We stood watching the waves rolling like logs off a hilled pasture. I have never had a more satisfying nap.
These people are what I would call a family. We eat together; we laugh together; we smoke together; we sleep together; and we wake up to the heartbeat of the morning together. I have never lived with strangers that are so familiar. It is uncommon for a day go by when one of us is not taking care of the other. Just today, LA took care of me while I was feeling lonely. She did not need to be by my side, yet she did so willingly. On the couch, she read poetry and rubbed my head in her lap as I remembered why I was not crying. I am not alone anymore. I have been alone for too long and the feeling comes and goes - a natural occurrence, a habit. Soon I will throw it out as I do with all useless trash - a empty pack of cigarettes recently shared among friends.
I do not dream at night, but this afternoon while taking a nap I dreamed that my friends and I were vacationing in a strange place, a circus beach town. We were all holding hands, or linking arms, I can't remember quite well. The day turned to night and the beach was purely green. We stood watching the waves rolling like logs off a hilled pasture. I have never had a more satisfying nap.
These people are what I would call a family. We eat together; we laugh together; we smoke together; we sleep together; and we wake up to the heartbeat of the morning together. I have never lived with strangers that are so familiar. It is uncommon for a day go by when one of us is not taking care of the other. Just today, LA took care of me while I was feeling lonely. She did not need to be by my side, yet she did so willingly. On the couch, she read poetry and rubbed my head in her lap as I remembered why I was not crying. I am not alone anymore. I have been alone for too long and the feeling comes and goes - a natural occurrence, a habit. Soon I will throw it out as I do with all useless trash - a empty pack of cigarettes recently shared among friends.
9/14/09
Freshman Seminar Post #1
The days here at Fairleigh seem longer than those I spend at home and I like it. Usually, I wake up and do a few things and the day is over. Here, I'm doing things left and right and sometimes the line between my days is blurry. If someone asks me what I did yesterday, I will tell them only a fraction of what actually happened, because the rest feels like it happened on another day. I've never been this socially active, although I've never felt like I was lacking in that department.
Although I've adjusted well in the social aspect of college, I think it has brought down the level of motivation for classes and homework that i came with initially. I've become that high school senior that didn't do homework and never cared to pay attention to note taking again. There is one class that I do, however, love and will forever be motivated in. So perhaps that will eventually rub off and spread into the other subjects.
For now, I cannot say that I'm struggling, but I do wish to make some minor changes. Perhaps with a more motivated and peaceful mindset i will finally get out of my writer's block and write creatively once again.
-A.Sajak
Although I've adjusted well in the social aspect of college, I think it has brought down the level of motivation for classes and homework that i came with initially. I've become that high school senior that didn't do homework and never cared to pay attention to note taking again. There is one class that I do, however, love and will forever be motivated in. So perhaps that will eventually rub off and spread into the other subjects.
For now, I cannot say that I'm struggling, but I do wish to make some minor changes. Perhaps with a more motivated and peaceful mindset i will finally get out of my writer's block and write creatively once again.
-A.Sajak
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